Anyway I will let you know how it goes. What will I do until I go?

Look for my fucking flask.

Man Kills Wife for Changing Facebook Status to ‘Single’

Oh good, FoxNews pointed out another similar case.

She was asking for it too, I don’t think the cocaine and booze had anything to do with it.

You are being replaced bitch!

Seriously this trend of remaking the best movies of the 80′s with new shitty actors has to end! I just read that they are trying to remake The Karate Kid, with Jackie Chan and Will Smith’s son Jaden. Is nothing sacred?

You know if the first one sucked or our film technology was not on par with the vision of the film, then yeah remaking a movie is perfectly acceptable. Here is an example:

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy – That TV series in 81′ the movie in 84′ both had the right story, but the graphics and effects needed for the space scenes…well it didn’t exist yet. So when they remade it in 2005 (w/ Mos Def) well it turned out great! Well done!

But what the hell is the excuse with The Karate Kid? It was one of the best movies of the 80′s and I don’t really see a thing wrong with it. In fact one of the parts I really like is the simplicity of the 80′s, without all the cell phones and internets of today. If they remake The Karate Kid, that  would be like them trying to remake Ghostbusters! They aren’t trying to remake Ghostbusters, are they!? Apparently they are.

Those fucking bastards.

Other awesome movies that they are attempting to turn into lame modern clusterfucks…

Back to School: Supposedly staring Cedric “The Entertainer”. No Rodney, No Downey Jr, No Oingo Boingo!? Fuck that.

Short Circuit: Are you asshats fucking mad? How could you even consider remaking this? Same writers as the first, they just want to utilize new film technology…but why? Oh to put more fuel in their Yachts.

Weird Science: No word on who they are casting…but they will surely not be the Gary and Wyatt I know and love. And furthermore, this was made back when computers were considered to be limitless boxes of magic…times have changed.

There are more like Top Gun, Footloose, Fame and pretty much every other movie made in the 80′s good or bad. I guess this goes to show that the movies are more about making money than doing something you love and entertaining people.

Cold Chillin...

So I was just checking out CNN.com and I saw this article explaining that Zoo Officials in Japan figured out why their two Polar Bears are not mating after repeated attempts…they’re both FEMALE Polar Bears.

Now while I don’t know thing one about bears, I am fairly sure I can pick out the boys, they’re the ones that have a wang. In fact not just any wang… I would imagine like other animals of that size, like say a horse, that the wang in question is probably rather large and scary.

After being wrong about the sex for 3 years, how did they figure it out? These Polar Bear Specialists had to actually put the Polar Bear under anesthesia and flip it over to check out his junk only to find out SHE has an ‘innie’ not an ‘outtie’.

I know that these bears are covered in hair all over…but you guys did go to school for this and apparently you suck at it. So if these ‘scientists’ are the best hope Polar Bears have for survival, well I am sorry Polar Bears, but you’re fucked.

Obviously this one is a male…

Now how hard was that??

Read more about what passes for a Polar Bear Specialist in Japan on CNN…